Therapy with Hermione
by Almighty Short One VIP
Summary: PTSD is terrible, it destroys families and it rips apart the person who has to re-live every horrible event they lived through. Harry's marriage will be ripped apart to be replaced with something better.
1. Chapter 1

Hey guys! I'm back after a super long hiatus. College happens. I'm graduating soon which is why I don't update often. Anyway, I wrote this story because I, personally, haven't read any stories that show Harry with post-traumatic stress disorder and, as a psychology minor, I want to write one about that. PTSD is terrible, it destroys families and it rips apart the person who has to re-live every horrible event they lived through. And, as my friend put it, I have two marriages to destroy in this story. So I will. I think everything will turn out in the end. Thanks! :)

DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER, NOT JK ROWLING. If I were, it'd be HarryxHermione all the way.

* * *

><p><strong>Harry<strong>

"AAAHHHHHH!"

"Harry! HARRY!" Ginny shook her husband awake. This was another nightmare in a string of on and off again dreams in the past several years. Ginny was no stranger to Harry's nightmares but she was growing tired of them, night after night, year after year.

Harry whipped his head back and forth looking for the invisible enemy. Swear poured down his chest and back. Finally the face of his wife came into focus.

"Ginny," he sighed, "I'm sorry I woke you and scared you… again." He hung his head ashamed.

"Haven't you been drinking the potions that healer gave you? Do they help at all?" She ran her hands through his hair and down his back trying to calm him.

"I've tried! None of them do anything for me!" He clenched the sheet in his fists. "You think I ENJOY these nightmares?"

"Shhh! You'll wake the children." Ginny tired again to calm him. "I know you don't enjoy them. But you've done everything you can. What more can you do?" She turned away from him looking at the wall. She ran her hands through her red hair in a movement she'd picked up from Harry many years before. "Let's try going back to sleep. I'm leaving tomorrow for Germany with the Holly Head Harpies." She snuggled under the covers and rolled away from Harry.

Harry, on the other hand, shoved the sheets away from him violently. He left their room and wandered down the halls of his home in Godric's Hallow. He passed the rooms of his sons and somehow found himself in his daughter's bedroom. She had been born only a few months ago. The nightmares had stopped for only a short while after she was born.

His fingers traced the squishy baby powdery face of his daughter. He loved her, no question about it. He had always wanted a daughter and a large family, or any family for that matter. But he had always imagined his family being happy, less stressed and certainly not falling apart like his current family was doing.

He knew something was wrong with himself. These nightmares had been invading his mind for the last several years, since the war ended. He never remembered them but the feelings were the same: fear, panic, anxiety. He tried talking to Ginny but all she did was send him to a healer. He didn't need potions or spells. He needed to talk to someone.

When this realization dawned on him, he wrote a letter to the only person he could knew he could talk to without being judged. Hermione.

**Hermione**

"Ron! Ronald Weasley! Would you MIND?" She elbowed her husband who was snoring loudly.

"Huh? What? Whas goin' on?" He asked sleepily.

"You were snoring. Quite loudly." She crossed her arms over her chest angrily.

"I'm sorry Hermione. You know I don't mean to." He looked at her lovingly, trying to pacify her.

"Yes, I know the anatomy behind-"

"What's that at the window?" He pointed a finger at their bedroom window.

"It's an owl. I think it's Harry's owl!" She dashed to the window, tripping and tangling herself in the sheets in the process.

"Oy Hermione. Don't take all the covers with you!" He grabbed the sheets back onto the bed.

"Oh come on. Don't you want to know what he has to say to us? Especially at this time of night?" She stood up and flung the sheets away from her.

"I s'ppose." He rubbed his eyes with his fists and got out of bed as well.

_ "Dear Hermione,_

_You remember the nightmares I've had for, well basically for forever? They've started coming back. I thought they were gone after Lily was born but I guess I was wrong. Ginny keeps insisting I go to a healer and take potions. But I don't NEED potions. I NEED to talk to someone. I was hoping I could talk to you about them? I'm so tired of these nightmares and I know Ginny is too. Please help me, help us._

_ Love,_

_ Harry J. Potter"_

"Well, that was important." Ron grumbled. He never was easy to talk to when woken "rudely".

"Ron! He needs our help!" She stomped her foot, silently demanding he help.

"He addressed the letter to YOU, Hermione. Not me, you. We're best mates yeah but guys don't talk about feelings and stuff like that. This sounds more up your alley anyway. You're all smart and emotions and stuff…" he trailed off as he fought the sheets to get back into bed.

"Well you're right. Sorry Darling but you have the emotional range of a teaspoon." She got into bed and snuggled up next to Ron. "I'll owl him tomorrow and we can figure things out."

"I'm sure you will Love." He kissed her forehead and they both fell asleep.

**Harry**

Ginny was in the kitchen making breakfast for her family. Being raised by Mrs. Weasley, she'd learned a lot about cooking. And while she thought a woman should keep her family happy, she did NOT agree that a woman should give up her career, which was why she was leaving on tour with the Holly Head Harpies. After she made sure her family was well fed and happily on their way to whatever the day brought them.

She tried to reach a bowl on the top most shelf, forgetting she could summon it. Her fingers just barely grasped it before it fell and shattered on the floor. She began to _reparo _it but suddenly dropped it, re-shattering the bowl because Harry banged into the kitchen.

"STUPEFY!" He screamed pointing his wand at Ginny. He realized his mistake the moment the spell left his lips. "Shit."

Ginny lay knocked out on the floor. This was not the first time this had happened either. At the beginning of their marriage, every loud noise, creak of the floor, or sudden sounds resulted with his reflex of stunning the enemy. Although most of the time, the "enemy" turned out to be his wife.

"Enervate" he whispered.

Ginny moaned and pulled herself up off the floor. She looked around stupidly before realized what had happened, again, for the millionth time.

"Harry. James. Potter!" she growled, her fingers shaping into claws. "I have had ENOUGH of this! I thought we were past this!" she flung her arms wide, indicating to the glass bowl on the floor. "This is ridiculous! I don't…" her voice broke, "I don't know how much more of this I can take. Maybe, while I'm on tour… we shouldn't talk. We need… _I_ need a break. I'm sorry Harry." She looked down, her furry subsiding.

"I don't blame you. I'm sorry I'm so messed up. Listen, I'm going to see Hermione today. Maybe she can help." He reached out to hug her.

Ginny allowed herself to be folded into his arms. "I'm sorry this is happening to us. We never had it easy. But I thought we would." Before either of them knew it, they were sliding to the floor and crying on each other.

**Hermione**

"Ron, I'm off to see Harry." She whipped her muggle coat around her shoulders and stuffed her arms in the sleeves. "I don't know when I'll be back but please don't forget to feed the kids!" She buttoned up her coat as Ron walked to the entrance way with her. "You know Rosie doesn't like meat at this stage and –"

"And Hugo doesn't like carrots or bananas. I know." He kissed her hat covered forehead. "You think you'll be warm enough in that get-up?" He chuckled softly.

"Yes!" She huffed indignantly. "I've got two jumpers on under my coat. And I'm apparating. It's not like I'll be outside long."

She looked up into his ocean blue eyes and felt her heart warm. He pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her waist. She put her mitten covered hands on his chest and stood on tip toes to kiss her husband softly. His arms tightened around her, pulling her closer.

"Ron," she regretfully sighed, "we can't do this right now. The timing AND the location is off! What if Rosie or Hugo saw us? Hmm?" She giggled like a school girl.

"So? They will know Mummy and Daddy love each other very, very much." He rested his forehead against hers.

Chocolate eyes met ocean blue once more and they were wrapped in a passionate embrace. Ron pushed her against the closed closet door while his tongue sought entrance to her mouth. Hermione sighed in happiness.

"EEWWW! Mummy! What are you doing?" Rosie screeched, effectively ruining the moment. Her face was of disgust.

"Rosie, Daddy is showing Mummy how much he loves her!" She giggled, hiding her face in Ron's chest, who pulled her closer in response, letting out a deep belly laugh.

He released Hermione and walked toward Rose. "Alright Munchkin, let's get you fed. And then we can play monster in the cave!" He tossed her in the air and she squealed in delight. Ron winked at Hermione before he walked around the corner to the kitchen.

Hermione stood in the entrance way for a moment longer with her hand on her heart, filled with such happiness that her life was so good. Then she thought about Harry, poor Harry. It seemed his life was falling apart. With sadness weighing her heart she walked out the front door to rescue her best friend.

* * *

><p>Read and review as always! But only review if you think I've earned one. I also apologize for any grammar mistakes I may have made as I don't have a beta yet. No flames please but constructive criticism always welcome. And if you have plot ideas feel free to send them my way and I'll try to add them! :)<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

Ok folks, chapter 2 is up! Sorry it takes me forever to get them done. I'm getting ready to move back to school and I'm going to be SUPER busy this year. Well I hope you enjoy it! :)

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER**

* * *

><p><strong>Harry<strong>

Harry wandered his house aimlessly. He was ashamed that he stunned his wife. He'd done it before and felt immense guilt then as well. He raked his hands roughly through his hair as if pulling out his hair would make his life better.

A soft knock startled him from his thoughts. Forgetting he was dressed in only his sleep pants and that it was basically a blizzard outside, he opened the door to a wide-eyed Hermione.

"H-Harry! You really should put on something decent!" She pushed past him into the foyer.

He looked down and then turned a brilliant shade of scarlet. "Oops! Sorry 'Mione. Let me get dressed." He bolted up stairs feeling even more ashamed then before.

Hermione made herself comfortable on the large white sofa while waiting for Harry. A few minutes later a sleepy eyed James and Albus made their way down the stairs, followed closely by Harry who was holding a squirming Lily.

"Sorry, the kids woke up and they should be fed. Ginny left a while ago but thankfully left food waiting for them." It wasn't that Harry was a terrible cook. Quite the opposite, he was an exquisite chef but hated cooking because it reminded him of the Dursleys. He only cooked when he had to and on special occasions. Ginny never understood, but didn't mind. Hermione knew and understood why he never cooked and so always made sure to cook for him when possible.

"Of course Harry. I'm fairly certain Ron fed the kids after I left. They're so particular at this stage. I can barely keep up." Hermione said pulling out the food Ginny had set aside for the children's breakfast and using a heating charm. "Do any of your children have any particular likes or dislikes? I've read, in a muggle book of course, that if a child doesn't like a certain food you should 'take it off the menu' for a week and then re-introduce it later." She put the plates in front of Albus and James. "I don't know about that. What do you think Harry?" She had summoned four glasses and magicked them to fill with apple juice for Albus, milk for James and orange juice for her and Harry.

Harry sat on his stool by the kitchen island holding baby Lily and staring at the counter. He slumped forward making Lily uncomfortable. She started squirming so violently she started to slip from Harry's grasp.

"Albus! Grab your sister please!" Hermione said reaching an arm across the island. Albus did as he was told, almost failing to catch his sister.

"HARRY JAMES POTTER! You almost dropped your daughter. What is the matter with you?" She screeched, coming around the island to look him in the face.

Not realizing Lily had been taken from him, he looked at his empty arms and asked, "Hey, where's Lily?"

"Your daughter almost fell from your arms." She pointed at Albus who was trying to calm a wriggling crying Lily.

"Oh," he whispered. "I hadn't realized. I'm sorry guys, today didn't start well and your mother and I…" he trailed off, not knowing what he and Ginny were at the moment.

"Albus and James could you please take Lily upstairs. If she needs to be changed could you please do it? I'll make you a special lunch if you will." Hermione whispered while pulling Harry to her, holding him tightly.

Harry was glad Hermione was holding him so he could cry without his children seeing his weakness. When he was done he looked up at Hermione and told her he was sorry for crying.

"No! Don't be sorry Harry. What happened to make you fall apart like this?" They had moved to and were sitting on the sofa in the sitting room.

"The war happened. I was born and that's what ruined my life. Voldemort just HAD to pick me, didn't he?" He was looking at his hands in his lap. "I don't regret anything in my life and I'm glad it was me who stepped up to defeat him. And I'm glad I could do something in my life. But it's so overwhelming sometimes." He didn't dare meet Hermione's eyes in case she was ashamed of him.

"I know. I was there by your side; Ron and I both were, for many years. No, this is not the life you should have led, no one should lead that life. But you did. You did so with grace and courage." She took her hand in his and looked into his eyes with so much affection Harry started crying again.

"But so many died for me. They shouldn't have died Hermione! Remus and Tonks are dead and their son, my godson, is all alone in this world. It's not right or fair!" He yanked his hand out of hers and paced in front of the sofa.

"Harry, they would have died for the cause with or with_out_ you. The war, ending Voldemort, was something they believed in. They knew the risks and they choose to act anyway. As for Reums and Tonks, they wanted a better life for their child." Hermione pulled him back onto the sofa. "YOU have no personal responsibility for them. They were consenting adults and they made their own choices. You cannot blame yourself for their deaths." She had placed a hand on the side of his head. "You do, however, have responsibility for your children and your godson. You need to start taking better care of yourself."

"I know Hermione." He covered her hand with his. "It's so hard when there's no one to talk to and I bottle everything up. I know Ginny would be happy to talk and listen but she wasn't THERE with us. She can sympathize but she cannot understand. I need someone who understands me." He looked up from his lap and into her amazing chocolate eyes.

"Well, you asked me to talk. Maybe I could be some sort of therapist for you Harry. I've read loads on psychology. And it might help me as well, to get some things off my chest. We could do a sort of weekly meet up and just talk. Will that work for you?" Hermione had withdrawn her hand and pulled her calendar out from her purse. "It appears I'm free most Sundays, late morning or afternoon. How about you Harry?"

Harry, suddenly shocked he missed Hermione's hand on his face, nodded dumbly. "Yeah, I s'ppose that would work. Ginny's gone for Merlin knows how long, but I'd rather we not tell her just yet." He looked back down at his lap, "thank you, Hermione, for understanding and for not judging me."

"No need to thank me, Harry. You're my best friend and I want to help you." She stood up from the sofa. "Oh it's getting well past lunch, I really should get home. I wonder if my house is still standing!" She laughed lightly.

Harry joined her and escorted her to the foyer. "I'm really glad I decided to ask YOU for help Hermione." He said helping her into her coat. "But are you going to be alright in that? It's quite cold out there."

"Honestly Harry! You sound exactly like Ronald! He said the same thing before I left." She playfully glared at him and stomped her foot. "But yes, I will be quite alright. I'm only apparating anyway. I won't be in the cold long."

"Alright," he said almost sad, "I guess I'll see you next Sunday then?" he asked looking at her standing in the door frame.

"Yes, Sunday at 11:00 am sharp! I will be here whether you want me or not!" She pointed a finger at him.

"You are always welcome here Hermione. See you." He waved her good bye. With a smile and a wave she disappeared into nothing.

**Hermione**

"Ron, I'm home!" Hermione yelled, peeling off her jacket and throwing it in the hall closet. It occurred to her after she had taken off her boots she had not yet been greeted by her children or her husband.

"Ron… Ron Weasley… Ronald? Merlin's pants, RONALD BILIUS WEASLEY! WHERE ARE YOU?" She walked into their living room and was greeted with the sight of a giant pillow fort her husband and children were sleeping in. Well, her children fit fully into the fort while Ron's legs were sticking out.

"Oops." She moved to cover Ron's feet when all of a sudden her children and Ron tackled her to the ground.

"Mummy! Do you like our fort? Weren't we so quiet when you came home?" Hugo was bouncing on her stomach.

"Daddy told us to be very quiet and pretend to sleep! He wanted to surprise you!" Rose was pointing her finger at Ron.

"Hey you rascals, you wanted to surprise her too!" He fake-frowned at Rose. "Welcome home, Love. How was Harry's?" He kissed her forehead.

"You went to see Unca Harry and didn't _tell us?_" Rose cried indignantly. "I haven't seen him for two whole weeks Mummy!" She huffed and crossed her arms over her chest. Rose and "Unca Harry" were very close. Before Harry and Ginny had a daughter, Harry always doted on Rose. It wasn't that there was a lack of baby girls in the Weasley family, but it was because she was so much like her mother.

"Yes baby girl. I went to see Unca Harry. He wasn't feeling so well and asked me to come over. I think he's doing a bit better today, but maybe we should visit him more often, hmm? What do you think about that?"

"YES MUMMY! OH PLEASE MUMMY! Maybe Unca Harry can teach me more about flying a… oops." Rose clamped her hands over her mouth.

"Rose! That was a secret! Now you mother will never let us hang out with Unca Harry alone!" Ron was lying on his side and fake chastising Rose.

"I'm sowwy daddy. It was an accident!" Rose's words were muffled by her hands.

Hermione just laughed it off and plucked herself up from the floor. "All right my little garbage disposals, who's hungry?"

"Me!" Ron exclaimed first and loudly.

"You're always hungry Ron! Come help me with lunch please." Hermione said from the kitchen window which looked into the dining room and family room. It was amazing how her life and fallen into place. She would never trade her family for a moment. But it was this feeling that made Hermione stop and feel guilty. Harry's life was falling apart while hers was falling together.

Hermione was staring into nothing, the spatula poised to flip the grilled cheese she was making.

"Oy! You're gonna burn the sandwiches!" Ron cried out and slid himself between Hermione and the stove, taking over in order to rescue his sandwich.

"Oh, dear. I must have been spacing out. I'm sorry. Are your precious sandwiches ok?" She had been knocked back into the cupboards behind her. They stared at each other for a few moments.

"He's that bad, is he?" Ron reached out and took her hand.

"I'm afraid so. Ginny left for her world tour this morning and Harry was so out of it he almost dropped baby Lily!" Tears were filling her eyes as she recalled the look on Harry's face.

"It's alright love," Ron pulled her into a hug, wrapping his arms around her shoulders with her arms on his chest. "Harry will pull through this, he always does. I'm sure he will be ok."

"You're right," Hermione said, pulling away slightly but still remaining in his arms. "Harry and I are going to have a weekly chat, therapy, if you will."

"Ther-a-what?" Ron asked, looking puzzled.

"In the muggle world, it's when people who are depressed, anxious or just need someone to talk to, go to see a special type of a doctor, a mind doctor, who they talk to on a regular basis. It's been proven that talk therapy, in combination with medication, is the best way to treat depression. So Harry and I are going to do that. I'm going to be his 'mind doctor', so to speak."

"Oh. Why didn't you just say you're going to talk to him every week?"

"I did! That's what therapy is my dear!" Hermione giggled and fully hugged Ron. "C'mon now. I s'ppose we better feed the garbage disposals before they eat everything else."

* * *

><p>Alright, what did you think? Read and review! No flames please but constructive criticism is always welcome!<p> 


	3. Chapter 3

Hey lovely people reading my story. Here is the next chapter, sorry it's taken forever to get it out. I apologize more at the end. Read and enjoy!

* * *

><p><strong>Time jump to the following Sunday<strong>

**Harry (and his children)**

The week had gone by very slowly for Harry. Work was never ending and he was quickly becoming disenchanted with his work. Being an Auror was not what he expected. There was too much kissing up and politics. Harry was not the type to suck up and play politics to get ahead in work. It was because of this that he was stuck in the office, doing paperwork for those who DID play.

His children also knew something was wrong with their father. They had tried all week to make him less sad. They had tried making special artwork (Albus made a spectacular macaroni sculpture of a cat), making dinner (James had succeeded in setting that on fire), and reading him bed time stories.

"I can't wait for Aunt Hermione to get here. He was so much better after their talk last week." James said to Albus while bouncing baby Lily on his legs.

"I KNOW. I don't know what she did, but she's a magic maker, that one. I really hope she can fix him again. By the way, have you heard from Mum since she left?" Albus looked up from drawing shapes in the carpet.

"No, I haven't. I don't expect we will. Didn't you hear them? Mum and Dad were fighting right before she left. They were both crying on the kitchen floor." James had stopped bouncing Lily, and hugged her tightly instead, a sad look on both his and his brothers face.

"Well, let's go get some breakfast, shall we? I think it would be best not to be around when Aunt Hermione is here." James, being the elder, asked, trying to be responsible and helpful to his father.

"Hey kids!" Harry called from the base of the stairs. "It's time to eat. Aunt Hermione will be here soon! I also heard she's bringing over Rosie."

"ROSIE!" James and Albus screamed. Holding a gurgling baby Lily, James and Albus ran down the stairs in a blur, waiting for their cousin.

They didn't wait long before there was a knock at the front door. James hastily threw Lily into his father's waiting arms.

"Rosie! I haven't seen you in forever! Come on, I have new toys to show you!" Albus grabbed her hand, tugging her towards the stairs.

"Not until you guys eat. After breakfast you can show her everything." Harry directed them to the kitchen, still holding Lily.

"Hey Hermione," Harry greeted her with a kiss to her temple. "How was your week?"

"My week was long, excruciating, and dreadful. I could keep going if you'd like?" Hermione responded cheekily, tossing her coat into the coat closet in the entrance way.

"No need. I understand how you feel." Harry frowned and looked at the floor. "But don't worry, we'll get to that soon enough, right?"

"Yes, quite right. Now, did you want me to make breakfast for the kids? I know you hate cooking…" Hermione was already rolling up the sleeves of her fashionably oversized jumper which hung on the edges of her shoulders and digging in the fridge. "I see you have eggs and cheese and… jalapeños? Wow Harry, you really need to go shopping more often! Do you have any bread and nutella? I'll make them some toast." She bent down to the lowest shelf in the pantry and Harry got a fabulous few of her backside. She may have had two children but she was in excellent shape. Or so the leggings she wore implied.

Harry had been staring (and enjoying) and before he knew it, Hermione was snapping her fingers in front of his face. "Off in la-la-land, Potter? Be glad you didn't drop your child this time. Albus isn't paying enough attention to save her today." She giggled and continued to make toast for everyone.

It seemed they were all one big happy family: Hermione (the mum) making breakfast, Harry (the dad) watching her make breakfast/lusting after her backside, the children playing in the sitting room and the new baby Lily babbling away happily on Harry's lap.

'_Woa, better watch yourself there Potter! Hermione is not, nor will she ever be, your wife. You already have a wonderful, amazing… loud, rough, and mostly angry wife. Again, watch yourself Potter. If Ginny heard you thinking that, you'd have a face full of her bat-boogey hex before you could even think Protego. However, there is nothing wrong with admiring an amazing backside… even if it IS Hermione's _Harry's inner dialog had distracted him enough to not realize he had food in front of him.

"Again with the spacing out Potter! You might as well buy a house in La-La-Land for all the time you spend there." Hermione chastised jokingly.

"And I'm sure the house there would be cheaper than the house I currently own!" Harry joked back. "The mortgage on this house is insane. Good thing I'm Harry Potter 'boy-who-defeated-the-darkest-wizard-of-all-time' and managed to get the price lowered on this house!"

**Hermione**

"Wasn't it YOU who insisted on living in Godric's Hallow? Ginny told me she would've been happy living near her parents." Hermione waved a nutella full knife in an accusatory manner. "To be honest though," she slammed the knife into the nutella jar and put her hands on the counter, "I think she wanted a large house. She wanted the glamour and the 'lifestyle of the rich and famous', so to speak. She never was one to settle for plain."

Harry's shoulders slumped a bit. He ran his hands across Lily's head trying to sooth himself.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything until we started our session. Let me give the kids their toast and we can start." Hermione magick'ed the plates full of toast and glasses of juice into the living room.

"Hey guys, here's some toast. I'm sorry I didn't make anything better. And you can't just transfigure food out of thin air, you can only multiply what you have and unfortunately, you don't have all that much right now. Your father really needs to go shopping." She handed each child a plate and a glass and told them to go upstairs to play.

"Thanks for the education Aunt Hermione!" Albus shouted as he ran up the stairs.

"There never is a bad time for education!" Hermione happily sang, arranging herself on the sofa. "Alright Harry, time to start our session. Now, I've brought some psychology books with," at this she pulled large books out from her purse, which had a similar undetectable extension charm not unlike the one on her beaded handbag, "and I thought we should start with the symptomology. So, go on, tell me how you feel and have been feeling." She then whipped out a notebook and a quill, crossed her legs and leaned forward, analyzing every aspect of Harry.

"Well, uh…" not being used to such scrutiny, Harry was very uncomfortable. "You see… it's these nightmares really. I don't remember the details, but I remember the feelings. I always feel panicked and anxious and scared." He hung his head after this admission, feeling slightly un-manly.

After furiously scribbling in her notebook, Hermione took note of Harry's body language. "Oh Harry. Don't be ashamed. It seems only normal that you need tor react in some way from the war. This is your mind's way of dealing with everything." She reached out and put her hand on his knee.

"But why hasn't it STOPPED? It's been YEARS since the war. I should've dealt with it by now." Harry plucked at the wool of his jumper.

"That's the thing Harry. I don't think you HAVE dealt with it." She sighed and leaned back in her chair. "You see, Ron and I fought a LOT in the early months of our marriage. As you know, we didn't waste a lot of time getting married. But it was because of that and because neither of us had dealt with our emotions, decompressed or anything form the war." She pinched the bridge of her nose. "Those months were very hard. We said some really nasty things, things we still are hurt by. But we did talk everything out finally. We finally discussed his leaving me, us, during the horcrux hunt. I hate to admit it, but some days I still fear he will up and leave." She looked at the carpet and heaved a sigh. She swiped at her face before she looked back at Harry. "But we TALKED. We sorted everything through. And that's what you and I are going to do now."

And that's exactly what they did for the next six months.

***Time Jump** (A/N: sorry, I know most people hate these, as do I but I don't want to write out every session.) *

**Harry**

Over the three months of therapy, Harry and Hermione once again found themselves very comfortable with each other. But Harry was starting to feel something he knew he shouldn't feel for his best friend's wife.

He lay awake at night, thinking about her eyes, her amazing chocolate eyes with eyelashes to die for. Or so he assumed most women would die to have her eyelashes. He thought of the way she blushed when he complimented her on certain outfits. Often, he would think of her FABULOUS backside, which often ended with him needing to wank off in the bathroom or a cold shower.

He knew it was wrong on so many levels. But Hermione had always been there for him, followed him to hell and back. She was ALWAYS there, the one constant in his life. It surprised him that it took him THIS long to figure it out, after they had both gotten married and had families and lives that could be destroyed if Harry ever made a move.

But at the same time, it seemed only natural that he should fall for her. She was his compliment to everything: He was athletic, she a scholar. He overly emotional and irrational where she was calm and collected. He rushed in headfirst while she (over) analyzed every minute detail. How could he NOT fall for her? His infatuation with her had begun the day she had bent over to look in his fridge wearing those lovely leggings. Before he knew it, he was where he was now: fantasizing over his best (female) friend.

The next day, which was Sunday, it was nearly impossible to look at Hermione in the eye. He was ashamed to feel the way he did given the timing and the situation.

**Hermione**

"Alright Harry. So last week, we touched on possibly facing and re-living some of the experiences of the war. I think it might help you somewhat. What do you think?" Hermione asked, facing the kitchen counter. She was making tomato soup and grilled cheeses for everyone.

"I-I think that would be ok." Harry stuttered. It was obvious to Hermione he was not ready for such a treatment.

"No, it won't be ok. I can tell you're not ready. So how about we talk through a few experiences that don't hurt all that much. How about Fleur's wedding?" She was twirling her hand above the spoon that was stirring the soup. Hermione was quite proud of mastering a few wandless and wordless spells and actions.

"I think I'd like to talk about when I was dead. Did I ever tell you? I saw Dumbledore again…" Harry whispered to his hands.

Hermione sucked in a breath and stared at Harry. "No Harry," she whispered quietly, "you didn't tell me that… Why don't you tell me?"

Harry proceeded to tell her everything, about the disgusting piece of Voldemort's soul, King's Cross, the choice to either 'move on' or return to life and his ultimate choice to return to life.

"I told you before Harry, you have this "saving people" complex." Hermione giggled. "But I am truly glad you came back. I don't know what I would've done without you."

How true that statement was, Harry would never know. It's not that she regretted a single thing in her life. No, Hermione was very pleased with how everything turned out. She would not change a thing. But she loved Harry James Potter. That's not to say she didn't love her husband. On the contrary, she loved him very much. She just loved Harry _as well_. Each man had a part of her heart. She loved them both equally, but it was Ron that made his move, not Harry. But if he HAD made a move, her life would be with Harry, she would've been Mrs. Harry Potter. Some days, she imagined her life with Harry, but she never let herself feel for too long. She loved her husband and her children to the ends of the earth and back, or as Rose said "to the moon and fifty ten times over".

By the end of today's session, Hermione was running late for dinner. She hastily grabbed her things from the front closet and stuffed her feet into her boots.

"Alright Harry. I'm glad we made more progress today! You're doing so well." She beamed up at him. She stood up on her tip toes to kiss his cheek at the same moment Harry turned to kiss her cheek. Somehow, they ended up fully kissing. They stood there, wide eyed, lips still touching for a few moments, before Hermione, the always rational one, lowered herself from her tip toes.

"Well, that was… I should be going now!" Her voice rose an octave every syllable.

"Err, right then. Bye 'Mione." Looking into his eyes, Hermione saw something more than platonic love. Oh shit.

* * *

><p>Alright, my lovely readers! I am so sorry I haven't posted until now. College got busy and my job is more demanding than I thought. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I am hoping to push out another chapter soon. I actually have one of the last chapters written, I don't write in order. So that's driving me to finish. But I'm trying to NOT rush this story. If you think I'm rushing, let me know! Review if you think I've earned one! If you have suggestions for the story, review or PM me. Or if there is a scene you would like to see written, same thing. I'm open to suggestions. No flames, constructive criticism welcome!<p> 


	4. Chapter 4

Hey guys! Sorry it has taken me so long to get this up. I have been really busy with my trip to Spain and my last semester of undergraduate. I finally graduated! So now I will have a bit more time to write. I will be trying to apply to graduate school and interviews, so don't expect weekly or anything. But I will try to finish before the summer is over. Enjoy!

* * *

><p><strong>Hermione<strong>

Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit.

Given that no one knew about her love for Harry, Hermione tried to squash her feelings for her best friend. Over the years, it had become easier and easier to stop reading into the things he did or to slow her heart rate whenever his eyes met hers. She never stopped loving him but she hid her "symptoms" quite well.

But that kiss! How was she to react? No, no. It was an accident. You shouldn't read into it _at all_, she chastised herself. An accident, an accident, yes. Nothing more. She kept this stream of thoughts as she walked home. Because she'd been so distracted, she apparated near the Burrow instead. She was lucky not to get splinched. However, given her circumstance, she was grateful for the walk because it gave her time to get herself in order, meaning not look flustered when she got home.

By the time she got home, she was flustered anyway as apparently the wind decided to try and carry her away. Her wild hair was made even wilder by the time she opened the door.

"Hey Herrrr… Wow, did you stick your finger into one of those eklectrikity plugs or whatever?" Ron, who had been walking down the hall way past the front entrance, stopped mid step to stare at his wife.

"It's _electricity_ Ron. And no I did not. I went for a walk and the wind decided to have a go with me, except it was not fun. NOT. ONE. LITTLE. BIT!" Hermione stated, trying to flatten her hair with her hands.

"Here love," Ron slipped a hair band from his wrist. At the questioning look from his wife he replied, "Rosie wanted me to braid her hair. I don't think it came out the way it was supposed to though."

"Good. I thought you were subtly telling me you wanted to grow your hair out like Bill's."  
>She angrily tied her hair back, "No way will that be happening." She reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I quite like your hair the way it is." She whispered seductively. "In fact," she twirled a stand of hair at the nape of his neck between her fingers, "I enjoy running my hands through your hair very much."<p>

Ron groaned and grabbed her hips, pushing them against the closet door. "But you wouldn't like my hair if it were long like Bill's?" He questioned, running his hands up and down the sides of her body.

"Mmm. No I don't think so." She tilted her head to allow Ron, who was busy kissing her neck, more access.

"Then I don't think I'll do that." He whispered against her neck.

"Please don't." She whispered, her voice thick with lust. Ron had pulled back to look at Hermione. Her eyes sparkled with love and lust.

"Why don't you show me how much you love my hair while the kids are distracted." Ron whispered. With this remark, Hermione kissed him deeply and they made their way to the bedroom.

**Harry**

_I just kissed Hermione Granger-Weasley. Oh shit. Too bad it didn't turn out to be more. WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING POTTER?_ Harry shook his head violently to try and clear the not-so-innocent images of him and his best friend from his mind. He was oh-so-glad to have a week before his next session so he could cool his mind. _That's the last thing you need Potter, a boner while your spilling your secrets to your best friend. How attractive! _He shook his head one more time before spending the day with his children.

In the middle of the week, a strange owl arrived at the Potter residence.

"Dad! Dad! The's a'wl at th' win'ow" Albus said with a mouthful of potatoes.

"Albus, don't speak with your mouth full. While Uncle Ron normally eats in this manner, it's not socially acceptable anywhere else." Harry educated his son while standing to receive the waiting bird at the window. After reaching his hand through the window to get the rather thick envelope, Harry was apparently not quick enough to remove his hand as the blasted bird bit his finger.

"BLAST!" Harry cried, sucking his finger to stop the blood. "That makes two foul fowls to bite me in this life! Ha, kids. Get it? Foul, fowl?" He tried to joke as to not scare his children with blood. Something Harry, James and Albus all had in common was their immense dislike of blood. And because of their age, it really disturbed the children.

"Very, _very_ funny Dad," James deadpanned.

"You're comedic gold, that you are." Albus snickered.

"At least I tried. That's all that counts, so says McGonagall! Or rather, that's what she told me all my years of Hogwarts while I was probably failing out." Harry tousled the hair of James affectionately before returning to his chair. After cracking the seal and unfurling the parchment only a quarter of the way, he asked his children if he could be excused.

"Why d'you need to be excused Dad? You're the 'adult' here." James responded. Always being witty and smart mouthed often got him in trouble, but this time his father was far too occupied to reprimand his son. "What no come back? C'mon Dad."

"Son… I suggest you take your brother and sister with you to another part of this _overly large, expensive_ house now. I'd rather not…express myself right now. I need to phone your Aunt Hermione before some major remodeling takes place." Harry struggled to get out.

"Alright, c'mon sissy. Time for a trip to Albus's room." James picked up Lily from her high chair while Albus grabbed what was left of her food.

Trying to reign in his anger and NOT murder his telephone (or other electronics near by), Harry decided a floo call was better.

"Hermione! Hermione!" His head stuck out into his best friend's house.

He heard the sound of chairs scraping the floor and felt slightly guilty he was interrupting their dinner. But, he knew he had to talk to Hermione and Ron. This was something only his two best friends could help him deal with.

"Harry? What are you doing? Don't you know it's the most important time of day? It's food time mate!" Ron grumpily replied into his fireplace.

"Ron, you know that's not polite, and if that were indeed true, you have three, possibly four or five, favorite times of day." She gently shoved Ron out of the way to see Harry. "What's up Harry? Surely it must be important as you've clearly interrupted your 'food time' as well."

"I didn't…how would you- ooohhh…" he realized he had baby food down the left side of his face from Lily throwing a hissy fit at her stringed carrots. "Well, yes it is important. Would it be alright for me to come over? I'd rather the children not hear what I have to say." He tried to hide the shame from showing in his expression.

Ron instantly changed his mood to his supportive role, or rather as emotionally supportive as he could be. He knew that was Hermione's forte (along with reading, writing, academics and so forth) while his was being muscle and strategy. "Sure mate. I'm gonna put the kids in front of the tele in our room."

Hermione and Ron stepped aside as Harry floo'ed over. Once he was in their house, he wasn't sure he understood how he was feeling. There was anger, oh yes. But there was also a feeling of being ashamed. His life shouldn't be falling apart this badly, nor should he need the counsel of his best friend every week.

"Alright mate, the kids are occupied and the volume is a bit louder so they can't hear us." Ron re-entered the room and rubbed his hands together, a gesture that mean he was unsure of how he should behave.

In response, Harry threw the stack of papers at Ron and Hermione. They each read the papers and were shocked. Ron was the first to speak up.

**Ron**

"What does my sister think she's doing?" His hands were shaking and he was trying very hard to not yell.

The papers before him and his wife were that of divorce papers. They stated "irreconcilable differences" as the main cause for the divorce. Ron knew they'd been having problems for quite some time, but he thought they would deal with it. He and Hermione had their fair share of hard times, right in the beginning of their marriage to boot. But they had talked about it together and with some outside help and decided it was more important to be together because they loved each other. Clearly his sister did not feel the same way.

"Mate, I don't know what to say. She's my sister, but you're family too." Ron rubbed the back of his neck, trying to get his thoughts in order. "I don't understand her. I know you were fighting, but was it really so bad?" He felt terrible for his best mate. He couldn't understand the situation at all because he and Hermione had taken the time to work things out. They created a family of love and talked out every fight.

"Apparently it was…" Harry stared at the floor, sadness overwhelming him. "I don't even… I can't begin to process this. But maybe it is for the best. I don't want to be fighting with Ginny in front of the children."

**Hermione**

"It has been stated that parents who stay together simply for the sake of a child isn't best. It creates a toxic environment and it is not best for the child. Sometimes, having two separate and loving homes is best." Hermione said.

She began to worry about court battles and custody battles. This could tear everyone apart. Ron was obligated to side with Ginny. She was his sister. Hermione was obligated to follow Ron because he was her husband. Where would that leave Harry? She began to worry what this might do to her relationship with Ron. _Prepare for the worst, expect the best_ would soon become her new mantra.

"I'm sorry I threw all of this at you. I just didn't know how to… I don't know how to handle things but I should get back to my children. I hope she doesn't go for full custody." Harry hung his head in defeat and walked back to the fireplace.

Not knowing overcame her, she ran to him and hugged him from behind. "Everything will work out the way it was meant to. Have faith in that." She whispered to him.

He wrapped his arms around hers and squeeze. "Thanks 'Mione." With that, he stepped back into the green flames and went home to his children.

* * *

><p>Review if you think I've earned one. No flames please! Again, if you have ideas of what you want to see in the story, PM me or leave a review. I'll try to incorporate it!<p> 


	5. Chapter 5

Hey all you lovely people who wait for long periods of time for me to get my ass in gear and publish another chapter! Thank you for waiting patiently. I feel bad because I write one chapter and then my muse for the story dies (or she fakes her death) and then I find another muse for another story, write that and then magically my muse for this story goes "Oh hey! I'm not dead. Here's some inspiration!" Anyway, long-winded apology. I'm really sorry. I hope you like this!

* * *

><p><strong>Hermione<strong>

After Harry left, she and Ron stood gazing into the fireplace, wondering how this would all play out. As if Ron was reading her mind, he wrapped an arm around her shoulder.

"Maybe it would be best if we played the neutral party here 'Mione. Gin, she's my sister but Harry's my mate. If I were to side with Gin, Harry wouldn't have anyone because your loyalty would be with mine, am I right?" He touched his head to hers.

"Yes, my loyalty lies where yours would in this case. But I can't stand the thought of leaving Harry alone. He's been alone for most of his life. And I think this would destroy our relationship with him and his children. Neutral party seems like the best way to go…" Hermione rubbed her arms. "But do you think Ginny would –"

"See this as us siding with Harry?" Ron finished for her. "Yes, probably. She's kind of nutty that way. You're either totally with her or totally against her, there's never been a middle for her." Ron sighed and started to walk up to their bedroom. "We should probably finish dinner and put the kids to bed, yeah?"

"Sounds like a good idea." Hermione agreed, her tone as heavy as her heart felt.

**Harry**

When he got home, his kids asked why he left so suddenly. How was he to answer them? How was he to be the one to destroy their family? The weight on his shoulders was suddenly impossible to bear and he slumped in his chair. He wanted to cry, the despair he felt was immeasurable. But it wasn't because he Ginny was leaving him. It was because his children would be put through hell watching their parents fight and leave each other. It was going to destroy them.

That night, Harry sent a letter to Ginny stating he would agree to the divorce but he wanted to wait until she came home to start anything. He wanted her to explain to the children why she was leaving. He thought it would be best if they presented a unified front to the children, to be as amicable as possible toward each other in front of them. He didn't want them to worry or hurt any sooner than necessary.

Since Ginny wasn't due home for another two months because of her tour, Harry tried to make everything as normal as possible for his kids. He did give them extra treats more so than normal but his children were not ones to complain, they took every treat with large smiles.

Aunt Hermione also made plenty of visits. Almost every day after work, she was over, making sure the kids were ok.

**Hermione**

She knew Harry would never do it, not intentionally of course, but she wanted to make sure there was not anger or hatred towards their mother. In fact, when Harry talked about her, he was always positive, saying "Mummy loves you," or "Mummy misses you," before the children went to bed.

But every night, Harry slumped into an overstuffed chair, looking so defeated, it was all Hermione could do to not find Ginny and slap her in the face. Her heart ached so badly and the only way she could think to express comfort to her best friend was with hugs and small touches here and there. She knew he wasn't one to vocalize his need for comfort and she didn't want to embarrass him by saying anything.

As the weeks progressed, Harry and Hermione became more comfortable being physical with one another. At night, when they were sure the children were asleep, they would cuddle on the couch.

**Harry**

Harry knew it was wrong, to be so physical with his best friend's woman. But eventually he numbed out the guilt and just enjoyed it. They became dependent on one another for comfort. And some nights, given that Harry would be single soon, it was all he could do to not kiss Hermione. All of his suppressed feelings were returning and he wondered how his life would be if he hadn't chosen Ginny when they returned home from the battle.

He wondered if they would cuddle and read books together.

He wondered if they would make love instead of the farce he and Ginny had been doing for so many years.

He wondered if he would've been able to handle his nightmares better.

But then he realized he wouldn't have his children and that was enough to stop his wondering, if only momentarily because he would imagine the children he and Hermione could have together.

**Hermione**

Hermione started pulling away from Ron unintentionally. She knew Harry needed her and was always there for him. But every night she came home to her husband and gave him all her love, in every way possible. It didn't help that she felt guilty, giving all her spare time to Harry, but he needed her. And if she were honest with herself, she needed him too. She couldn't give him up and she couldn't give Ron up either. They had a family! She couldn't do to Ron what Ginny was doing to Harry. She would never intentionally hurt her family. She just couldn't fathom the idea.

**Ron**

While Hermione wasn't aware of her actions, Ron certainly was. And he wasn't upset at either of them. He knew Harry needed Hermione. He also knew Hermione needed Harry. And he also knew he was one lucky man. He knew this because if he hadn't interfered and "laid claim" on Hermione all those years ago, she and Harry would be together. He was grateful that, at the end of the day, he got the girl, but was she really his girl to keep?

He had read somewhere "if you love someone set them free. If they come back, they're yours to keep, but if they don't, they were never really yours." He didn't really want to let Hermione go. But he knew she would be happy.

His whole life, things had been relatively easy, being the youngest male Weasley and all. His mother always made the hard choices for him. But after the war, he grew up and learned to make hard choices on his own. And sitting before him was a really, really hard choice.

Let her go or not?

* * *

><p>Alright people, review if you feel I've earned one. I don't have a beta, so all grammatical mistakes are my own. Feel free to let me know about them and I will correct them when I have time. I appreciate all your lovely reviews. They make me so warm and happy inside!<p> 


	6. Chapter 6

Hey guys! Sorry I haven't updated in...forever. I'm a grad student, I really don't have time anymore. :( But anyway, here's the next chapter!

* * *

><p><strong>Ron<strong>

Growing up was a part of life. A part Ron had tried to resist for many years. But now he had children to think about. What is best for them?

"Daddy I'm hungry!" Rose bounded into the living room, dressed in a full ballerina costume, fluffy tutu, tiara, and all.

"C'mon Rose, let's get some food. What do you want to eat?" Ron asked, hoisting her up on his hip.

"Well today is Red day, so something red." Rose pondered.

"Red day? What is red day?" He asked setting her on the kitchen counter.

"It means I only wear red," she pointed to her clothes, "and I only eat red things!" she pointed to a tomato.

Well if it means she eats vegetables, Ron would go along with just about anything. "Alright, Red day it is! How about some tomatoes? And some whole wheat pasta?"

Rose thought about it for a minute then declared, "As long as the pasta turns red with the sauce, then TECHNICALLY it's ok." She smiled sweetly up at her father.

"Yes, I believe the pasta will turn red. Is Hugo alright with Red day?" Ron asked while pouring the pasta into a pot of boiling water.

"No, but I made him be ok with it!" Rose answered cheekily. "Dad, when is Mummy coming home?" She slumped on the counter.

**Hermione**

"I'm right here! And watch your posture, Rose. You don't want to end up with back problems do you?" Hermione popped up in the kitchen window, attempting to scare Rose and Ron.

"Mummy! You scared me!" Rose squealed.

"I'm glad I did! You two might have gossiped about me." Hermione, who had come around into the kitchen, tickled Rose's sides.

"N-never Mummy!" Rose stammered out between her laughs. "We love you!"

"Yeah, we only say good things about you, like how lovely your hair is today!" Ron stated, carrying the bowl of steaming pasta to the kitchen island.

"My hair does look rather lovely today!" Hermione struck a pose and ran her fingers through her hair. In truth, her hair was a wild mess, having just walked through the windstorm outside.

She had gotten back from Harry's moments ago, where she and the children had eaten lunch. She was trying to fill in the spot that was soon to be vacated by Ginny. She knew it was wrong, preemptively taking over Ginny's role but she also knew Ginny wouldn't ask for full custody. If anything she would hand everything over to Harry. But Ginny was also unpredictable. It was hard to know what she would do.

Hermione was starting to feel like she was the mother in two families. Logically, she knew it was wrong. Emotionally, her heart was full to the brim with happiness: that she could make so many people happy. But she had the sinking feeling everything would blow up in her face and soon.

"Mummy?" Rose tugged on the hem of her shirt. "It's Red day. You're not wearing red."

"Oh it's Red day?" She quirked and eyebrow at Ron, "And what do we do on Red day? Other than wear red?"

"Well, you wear red and eat red things! So Daddy made us pasta with tomato sauce. The pasta isn't really red, but that's ok." She skipped over to the dinner table, her tutu flying with.

"Well, Rosie, honey, your tutu is pink…" Hermione cautiously informed her daughter.

"Mom! Pink is a shade of red. Didn't you know that?" Rose looked up at her mother from her chair. "Honestly, I was taught that in kinder. You should remember that." She huffed and whipped back to eat her lunch.

"We've created a sassy daughter, love." Ron siddled up to Hermione, kissing her temple before setting a salad on the table.

**Ron**

"But Dad! That's green!" Rose yelled and crossed her arms over her chest. "I cannot eat that!"

"You won't eat it, but you _can_ physically eat it." Ron pointed out. "Now please go get your brother."

"Fine! But I'm not eating that green!" She huffed and stomped up the stairs.

"Sassy indeed," Hermione agreed, staring out the window.

Ron watched her and contemplated everything. Their relationship wasn't toxic; rather, it was far from terrible. Yet he couldn't help feeling it was all falling away from him.

He was angry, yes, that Hermione was choosing Harry, just like he feared all those years ago. But he also knew if he hadn't acted, Harry would've gotten the girl. On some level, he felt they would end up together eventually but he kept hoping he was enough for Hermione, that the life they'd built together was enough. It wasn't fair to Hermione, but it wasn't fair to him either. And the worst part was he didn't have anyone to blame, not even himself.

Watching his wife stare out the window, he felt the beginnings of the end and he was powerless to stop it. But he would never stand in the way of her happiness. Never.

**Ginny**

Part of me wondered, what the HELL am I doing? That was only a small part. Most of me is just exhausted. I can't take this anymore. The nightmares, the constant worry of setting him off, always being cautious… it's enough to make a woman go mad. That's what I did. I slowly went mad.

And then I think of my children. My wonderful, sweet, innocent children, and I wonder if I can really go through with the divorce. We've tried getting him help. I took him to so many healers! Nothing worked! After Lilly was born, he was ok, but those damned nightmares came back. How can I live that way? How can he? Doesn't he want to stop them? I know he only sometimes takes the potions, and I never know when. So how do I know if they're working? I don't. The divorce is best for all of us.

But is it? How can I justify it? I will look like the woman who couldn't handle her husband, the woman who couldn't help him, and the woman who gave up on him. But I just can't do it anymore! I will destroy myself if I stay. Who am I kidding? I'm ripping myself to shreds thinking about this on my tour. I can't even focus enough to play for half, HALF, a game. I've been benched for the next two games.

This is not a question of if I love Harry. I love him, so much, which is why this is so hard. How can I let him go? I love him, I love my children, and we are a family. I've already sent the divorce papers, so what's done is done. Harry wrote me, asking to hold of on the proceedings until I come home, which at this rate might be sooner rather than later. Oy…

* * *

><p>Okay! Let me know what you think. Also, major thank you to everyone who has favorited this story (my other works, or my account in general). I appreciate the feedback, please no flames or anger. Thanks again!<p> 


End file.
